Norma...

While I know that Laura reads my Blog, I hope this is not hard for her...

Sometimes in this life we are richly blessed to meet someone who becomes a friend one will cherish for eternity. Laura Carter has been that kind of friend for me. The added bonus was I got to know her mother, Norma Ditto.

Norma lived with Laura and Howard and came to Church with them sometimes. This was where I first met her. She had a smile that would light up the room. She was tiny and frail to me even then but she had a spark that was contagious.

Norma was diagnosed with a rare form of stomach cancer. She eventually needed 24/7 care and Laura was the care-giver. For a while Norma could navigate in a walker but that eventually didn't work and her days were spent in her bed. Laura and Howard set her up with her bed by the window that overlooked their back deck. There was a bird feeder there and Norma could watch nature through that window as the seasons came and went.

I was able to visit her in their home several times during this last year of her life. I always enjoyed those visits tremendously. As her hand grew thinner with time, she would still hold my hand as we talked of all kinds of things. She would surprise me with her quick wit and wise counsel. I always left feeling uplifted and grateful she was a part of my life.

For Laura and me, the ability to have someone to talk about this time in our lives where we have been called on to care for aging parents was a God-send. We have been able to say anything and everything that came to our minds and hearts. To have that ability to share with complete openness and know there would be no judgment on feelings expressed or events shared and that these words would stay just between us and maybe our spouses was the best therapy anyone can have as they go through those kinds of experiences. They are hard emotionally and wearing even though you are grateful for them in a most tender way. To have that 'kindred spirit' with which to tread that path is a most profound blessing. Laura was and is that friend for me.

Howard called me one day over a week ago and told me that Norma was not going to live much longer. I called Laura that night and we talked briefly. Then we kept our eMail traffic going as time past.

Wednesday, Halloween evening, Norma passed through the veil and ended her mortal journey. Laura called later in the evening. I loved her little story and will share it here. The pastor at Norma's funeral also shared it. Laura said she could picture her mom getting to the pearly gates and St. Peter answering her knock. Norma would look up at him and say, "Trick or Treat!"  We had a good refreshing laugh at that one.

Sunday evening, November 4th was the visitation for Norma. Claude and I went to Louisville after Church and it felt good to get a Laura hug and know my dear friend was holding up well. It was great to see her daughters and hubby and grandsons all there to share in this family time.

Monday morning, I headed back to Louisville for the funeral. The pastor did a fine job with Norma's service. Then we all went to the cemetery for the internment. It was a cold morning. By the time this part of the service was complete, Ben, Laura's grandson, had had enough. He was ready to be down and move those little limbs some. Howard scooped him up and wisked him away from the group. I went back for one more hug from my dear friend before parting. As I walked back to my car, I noticed Howard playing with this cute little grandson. I turned back and asked Laura where her camera was. She is also a picture taking kind of gal. They all turned to where I was pointing. Howard, who is tall and thin, had placed Ben up in the branches of a tree. He was a most happy little guy now. Laura reached for her cell phone and I turned to leave.

These are tender feelings and sentiments for me. I'm grateful for Laura and Norma and the entire Carter family. They have made a positive and profound impact on my life. I'm grateful that Heavenly Father knew my needs so personally as to place this good family in my life. For that I thank him.

I'll miss Norma but I am sure she has met my mother and they, too, are kindred spirits.