This week has brought a drastic decline in my father's health. The man who walked a mile at break-neck speed in the morning and again in the evening every day except Sunday when he got to Kentucky has seen a huge change in that. Over the last year his walking has gone from one mile once a day in his neighborhood or at the Pavilion to a half mile in his neighborhood to a quarter of a mile in his neighborhood. Papa has also really started to lose his balance. If he stands still for very long, he will lean forward mostly but sometimes to either side.
Over the last two weeks, Papa has complained about his hip area hurting really bad. Now, with his nice new chair his back has been better. So the complaints about his hip seemed out of the ordinary. This last week he has taken to using the cane he kept from Uncle Murray all the time.
Last Monday, the 9th of December, I went to his apartment to take him grocery shopping. He just didn't feel like it. I assured him I was happy to do that for him. I have done this at least twice before recently. The Kroger he shops at is the huge Market Place kind. It is like walking a football field to get bananas at one end and milk at the opposite end of this store. In addition, Papa's memory is very bad and he gets confused about where he is in this store. I have taken to following him around and keeping him straight. So Monday, I did his shopping for him and brought it back to his apartment.
Wednesday, we were going to take a DVD of country music to the nursing home. I called Papa Tuesday evening and asked if he would like to take fresh flowers in Christmas colors to put on Mimi's grave before we went to the nursing and also have a bite to eat for lunch while we were out. He thought that was a good idea.
I called Papa Wednesday morning to remind him. He often forgets. When I got to Papa's apartment he had, had visitors before I got there. When they left, he just completely forgot it was Wednesday and we had plans. I found him stretched out in his chair and not ready to go out in the cold air at all. I reminded him of our plans and he got up and got dressed and ready to go.
We drove to Frankfort on the back roads and he totally enjoyed the ride. It was a clear, beautiful day even though it was very cold. We had a nice lunch at Zaxby's. Then we drove to the cemetery and put the new poinsettias on Mimi's grave. I love the location because I can pull the car right up to the side of the road and her grave is right there. Papa can sit in the car and have his moment without having to get out in that cold air.
Then we headed to the nursing home and played the DVD. When I dropped Papa off at his apartment he was worn out but happy with his day.
Thursday I was in Georgetown again and we checked out this cane he is using. It seems the rubber tip that should grip the surface was worn and duct tape had been Uncle Murray's solution. I took Papa's cane and, after getting bananas for Papa, went to a medical supply store and bought new tips for his cane. We are both much happier with this now much needed device. Papa was in greater pain than the day prior. I again suggested I call his doctor and see if he wanted to check him out or if he had another doctor he thought I might take Papa to. Papa agreed this time which indicates the amount of pain he was in. I left a message on the nurses phone and then headed back to Sadieville. The nurses called me later in the afternoon, I explained the situation, she said I should first bring Papa to Dr. Weckman. We scheduled an appointment for Friday at 2:30pm. I called Papa and told him to be ready and I would get him to the doctor.
Friday morning I called Papa to remind him. He was happy because he thought the appointment was for Monday. Goodness.
I got to Papa's apartment at 2pm. He was not ready. He got distracted by a television show that was 'really, really good'. I got him going and took care of letting Tiny out and some other items while he got dressed. I thought we were not going to get his shoes on him. He ended up wearing his slippers. We did make it to the doctor on time.
Dr. Weckman was really good with Papa. He asked questions about what Papa was experiencing. We explained the balance issues, the pain in the back and I insisted on a checking of Papa's memory. Dr. Weckman did one of those reflex tests on Papa's ankle. Papa felt nothing. Dr. Weckman tried a reflex test on Papa's knee. Papa felt nothing. Then Dr. Weckman said he was going to try a different tuning fork. This gave Papa a chuckle. Imagine our surprise when Dr. Weckman came back with a real tuning fork for middle C!! He whacked it a couple of times and then held it to the wall and, sure enough, we heard a perfect middle C. Then he whacked the tuning fork again and placed it on Papa's ankle. Papa felt nothing. Then he whacked the tuning fork again and placed it on Papa's knee. Papa felt nothing. Then he whacked the tuning fork again and put it on Papa's hand and Papa really felt that. Dr. Weckman then explained that Papa has peripheral neuropathy. This is nerve damage in the nerves which come out from the central nervous system (brain and spine). It can be caused by a variety of things. These little nerves send messages to the brain that tell it you are starting to lean and need to move your feet for balance. Normally this is instantaneous and you really don't pick up on any problem. For Papa his nerves are not sending the signals at all or not fast enough and he leans with the potential for falls. The problem...Papa has atrial fibrillation and takes warfarin, a generic of Coumadin. Because of this drug he cannot take the medications normally given for neuropathy. AFib wins out over neuropathy.
Then Dr. Weckman had Papa stand without his cane and face me. I was to catch him if he fell. Hmmm... Dr. Weckman touched a spot on Papa's lower back and asked if that hurt. Papa adamantly stated that was exactly where it hurt. Papa has arthritis in his spine and hips. There is a certain nerve running across this spot and that is where all Papa's pain in this hip is coming from. Geez...we had the back getting so much better with the new chair and now we have a hip issue that truly affects his ability to walk.
Dr. Weckman said Papa can increase in Tylenol intake to a certain level and absolutely no higher. Papa is to walk even if it hurts, otherwise he will lose the ability to walk. He also has some stretching he can do. Fortunately his chair will allow him to get his legs up straight and do that stretching in his chair.
It was a good visit and we learned some things that might help and also that this is just part of his aging and we just have to live with it.
Saturday Claude and I were gone most of the day. I called Papa while we were out Saturday to be sure he was okay and it was alright for Claude and me to continue our day. He was okay. He was in a lot of pain still. I told him I would get him for church today if he felt like going. At that point on Saturday he was not feeling like going out.
I called Papa this morning and he sounded A W F U L. I went to his apartment after choir practice and he was much better. I think the increase in pain medication was beginning to kick in. It was good to see him more alert and sounding so much better.
This getting older is tough. Caring for an aging parent is just hard work. You love them and do your very best but it is just hard physically, emotionally and mentally. I feel like I am in my 80's already. Not a complaint, just a fact. May my children watch my care of my parents and deal kindly with me if my later years are this hard to get through. Such is the cycle of life.
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